BREAKING: The 2016-17 Brooklyn Nets Are Not Very Good

Jeremy Lin air balling a layup leading to a wide open three from whatever Morris twin plays for the Pistons. Its only the preseason and you can tell this team is going to be hysterically bad. Im not a big Linsanity guy but he's really not that bad. When you play for a team this bad though it probably makes you like 40% worse than you actually are. Signing with teams this bad immediately sucks out your talent, its pretty much just a real life Space Jam situation. Aliens come down from space and steal everyones talent, players walk into Barclays as a member of the Nets and get waaaaay worse at basketball. Its science. Could Kentucky beat this Brooklyn team? Probably. If the Nets want to prove they are actual professionals and not the same as a college team thats playing in the NIT they need to hit up Coach Cal and play Kentucky ASAP. Get that reputation up a little and show everyone that you aren't a total dumpster fire. Cant wait for the Celtics to get the #1 pick in the draft. Thanks again Billy King, you a real one.

If you still take the Nets even a little bit seriously think about this; Brook Lopez is such a big cat fan that he can't live with his twin brother because their cats don't get along. Thats a real thing that happened. Someone should keep an eye on Brooke Lopez because he's clearly a psychopath. People that are that into cats can't be trusted, especially if they're 7 feet 275 lbs and can do real damage to normal sized people.