Golf My Way!
I love golf! Originally, I loved going to golf courses and drinking with my uncle, but now I love the game itself. As the husband of a very studious doctor, I find myself with a lot of free time on my hands and thus my game gets a lot of attention. Unfortunately, I am still not very good but I have become a fantastic cheater. Actually, cheater may not be the right term. While I tend to bend the rules some, I often try and adjust them to make more sense to my game. (And my playing partners as well of course!)
Here are some of my favorite rule adjustments.
1. Pace of Play Free Drop
If you hit a ball into an area where finding it would be eventual, I take a free drop. The ball must be played out of the crap it was going into but I do not give myself an extra stroke. If I was playing an event with a gallery, I would have either hit someone or one of them would have found my ball. Of course if the ball goes into water or woods, a lost ball stroke is necessary, but in a heath where it should eventually be found, I drop another and play on. (The groups behind me appreciate this one.)
2. I'm with Jack, divots are ground under repair
Look this one is easy, in the unlikely event my ball is actually in the fairway but lands in a divot, I'm moving it. The course is responsible for maintaining the fairways and I am not being penalized for their lack of due diligence. Besides, if Jack Nicholas believes it so, it's good enough for me.
3. There is no such thing as a three put for triple bogey.
If I am on the green and my first putt is for bogey, there will only be a second putt. The game is hard enough. If I am laying five and the hole is beating me up, No Más and let's go to the next one. Six foot putt for a seven, it's in already.
4. There should be a one stroke penalty if you put a bad thought in someone's head
Once again, golf is hard enough. If someone is putting and you say, "Don't leave it short." Penalty! If someone is teeing off and you need to say, "Watch out for the water on the right." Penalty! However, it is acceptable to hum a catchy/ annoying song that may get stuck in someone's head all the same. "You can Ring My Bell" is one of my favorites for this tactic.
5. If the Course is at Fault, Adjust Accordingly
I played Tarandowah near London, Ontario last summer and the sand bunkers had no sand. It was like hitting out of concrete. I put my tee shot in a green side bunker on a par three and my club bounced off the sand and drove the ball over the other side of the green; chip and a two putt double. No more of that for me, now its place the ball behind the trap, chip and hope. If the course cannot manage itself properly, my scorecard and I won't be the victim.
6. If You Reach the I Don't Give a Fuck Point, Just have Fun!
I try to limit mulligans and too much goofing around if I am scoring a competitive round, but if the round has reached the point where it does not matter, experiment away and know there is forgiveness. If you could care less about your score, don't keep it and look to learn new ideas. You never know, you might pick up on something that will help you in a future round. Just hope this is not the round you score that once in a life time hole in one!
Some of these rules may seem like sour grapes but I just to like to have fun on the course. It's a great way to have an active afternoon. South Western Ontario is a golfer's paradise. It has an excess number of affordable courses and it's not hard to find a fun game. Hope you all enjoy your summer and remember, the scorecard only records numbers, no pictures!
