The Con of Cowherd
Every day I go out for lunch around 10:40. It’s early but what can you do. When I began my teaching career in 1994, I discovered I was not much for staff rooms and I loved having some alone time to decompress. It got even better in 2010 when I discovered satellite radio and realized I could listen to ESPN in my car.
Honestly, I love a lot of the programs ESPN has to offer. From Mike & Mike to First Take to SVP and Russillio to PTI, I could go on. But the one I could never really take to was The Herd with Colin Cowherd.
Is he dumb? No! Cowherd definitely has his wits about him and he can be clever when he needs to be. On more than one occasion I have agreed with Mr. Cowherd (Not that my agreement with a situation makes him intelligent.) and even when I don’t agree, I can see some of his points. He also knows his sports and I imagine he does well in Vegas.
Is he too goofy? No! He maintains focus and has done some great stuff. He has a well-structured show and it flows well. The Herd is well produced and there are a lot of good segments. As he has stated on many occasions, it is not easy to fill three hours of airtime every day. Hell, I have a curriculum and I understand the difficulty in being interesting for 3 plus hours a day.
My problem with Mr. Cowherd is he is a fake and I doubt he even knows it. He praises himself on keeping it real and telling it like it is, but he does neither. He comes across the opposite of a homer, he says what he thinks people don’t want to hear to piss them off. He knows he can boost ratings if people hate him because the haters will listen. (Call it the Howard Stern Radio Theory)
Wednesday, Cowherd was discussing music. He decided to throw his support behind Taylor Swift. Personally, I don’t mind Taylor Swift and I find her music to be fun. I wouldn’t go to a concert or anything like that but if you listen to my IPhone long enough a TS song might pop up. That said, Cowherd started talking about how her music has a great hook and then proceeded to put down Radiohead and Rolling Stone magazine while praising U2; if ranked in popularity among his demographic, his two preferences are third and fourth. A clue perhaps! He went even further to berate a caller who was a musician himself because he wanted to prove that musically, TS’s portfolio was pretty weak.
If you need further evidence on his antagonistic ways, Cowherd never fails to take a shot at Canada. Everyone likes Canada. We are polite and nice and all that good stuff. Last summer when the Blue Jays were in first place, he said they didn’t matter because nobody cares about Toronto. When he discussed the Raptor’s two recent losses to Cleveland, he referred to them as blow outs. Last week’s game in Toronto was not close, but then we lost in Cleveland by four; still no respect. He talks about hockey like they are hillbillies on ice and he only discusses the CFL like it is the place to send football players to die. When challenged he simply states Canada doesn’t matter. In all fairness, Toronto is the fifth largest market in North America and most Americans believe Canada does matter. Maybe he was jealous of Vancouver as he was being raised in Washington.
Cowherd is also a bully in the truest sense of the word. He berates callers and tells them to change the channel if they don’t like it. (Honestly, a weak statement since there are not a lot of options at that hour.) He cuts people off before they make their point and mocks them after they hang up or are shut off. Since he is by himself, he is not called to task on this very often. (However the new assistant is doing a great job and I hope it becomes a two man show. He clearly dislikes Colin and Cowherd has no clue.) He then describes himself as a hard hitting interviewer but he is all fluff. Some guys will berate him for his stupidity but it’s rarely his pillow like questions. David Stern owned him every time he was on and treated him like an annoying kid in his class. Curt Shelling mocked every bad statement Colin made and Cowherd treated him like the adoring nerd treats the star QB. If the guest has power, Cowherd will bow down to him. If the guest has no power, expect Cowherd to treat them like the stars treat him.
Cowherd’s ignorance also hurts his cause. He likes to generalize about the WWE and WWE fans. He claims the rest of the world is not as tough as America. He had a rant about the NBA players and how the American players were always tougher. He repeated how much tougher KG was over Gasol (Pao not Marc), but KG is tougher than everyone. The same year, Non Americans were tough all over the league, ie Captain Canada.
Who is tougher Colin; D. Rose or Tony Parker? An American footballer or a Rugby Player? Sure there are soccer players but baseball players miss games because of hangnails.
So why do I listen? I listen for the others; the interviews with the solid guests and the sports updates. He interviewed the president today for God’s sake. I could listen to the Mike and Mike rebroadcast but I like the live aspect of the show. I am comforted knowing how many people dislike him and I think deep down he cares; Cowherd is not a very good heel. The Le Batard Gang, they do not care. When they had Bill O’Reilly on, they took pleasure in mocking him. Colin would have never done that. When Bill Simmons heard Doc Rivers was leaving his Celtics, he got mad at him. Colin would never have done that.
So I will keep listening and Colin will keep annoying me. Maybe I will eventually get to the point where I have to find a better program. Colin is a successful guy and he doesn’t need me to listen. I just wish ESPN had a better option than to punish my ears with this self-righteous mouthpiece. I don't like having him as a part of my day since he doesn't appreciate me or where I am listening from.
